Shout-Out Wednesday: "Infectious Enthusiasm, Professionalism And Genuine Care"

"Luther takes pride in his team. He is always ready and willing to being incredibly responsive to all requests. Thanks for being awesome!"

Good Morning Folks,

As FSO continues to grow and welcome new clients, we are constantly raising the bar to (re)IMAGINE™ the way to go to business - ensuring we deliver the very best experience to our clients and employees. 

We believe people make or break the success of an organization. We take care of our people and in turn, they take care of you. They bring a passion for hospitality and service that just can't be faked or duplicated.  

Here are this week's Shout-Outs:

                                    From Our AMLAW 200 Clients

Mark Vella – Newark
"Thank you to Mark for being a HUGE team player and going above and beyond to switch to the evening shift to help cover an open position. We appreciate you."

Jeremy — Boston
"Kudos to Jeremy for his quick and efficient response to all the client needs and his pleasant demeanor every day and in all that he does."

Linda — (Future Leader) Dallas
"Linda continues to show a great attitude at work every day while she handles multiple responsibilities that come into the office services department. Her big smile and welcoming demeanor puts out client at ease. She has been a huge asset and she does more and more each day to improve not only herself but her team. "

                                          From Our Retail Clients

NY/NJ Staff
"Great job to our staff who maintained flawless execution during a two week brand review all while covering for the CRM who was on bereavement leave. Their hard work and excellent service allowed the CRM to be with his family during a difficult time with the confidence that his team was providing great service and attention."

From Our Wall Street / Financial Services Clients

Team
“I wanted to send you a quick thank you note for your team’s hard work and diligence. All of the ladies and gentlemen from facilities and reception helped us pull together a successful event from start to finish. Andrew, Sharifa, and the rest of the team express a warm charisma and positive attitude that can be infectious to those around them. Not only that, they are diligent in their processes and follow through on their work. Both teams successfully helped us work through logistics and audible for the past two weeks and I am truly grateful for their efforts.”

At The Headquarters Of The World's Largest Communications Agencies

Katherine – New York
"Katherine was essential in helping during a week with a large number of internal and external meetings. She assist with the food deliveries, the calendar invites, follow up and any other logistics that were needed for the meetings. She made it all look effortless and without incident. She is the main reason all the meetings went on successfully."

From The World's Largest Professional Services Firms 

Faiza — Madison Ave
"Faiza’s quick and professional  assistance makes things much easier for the team and the client. She has managed to handle various issues that are time consuming but with her assistance the end user is able to focus on other matters. She gets things done quickly, efficiently and always with a smile and a positive attitude. She checks in with the end users every morning and afternoon to see where she can be of assistance. She is a great asset."

Icelsa — Madison Ave
“Icelsa stops by daily to see how she can help. Yesterday, she was the "perfect extra set of hands," helping me prepare to host a workshop. She gathered supplies and with troubleshooting a projector issue with IT. She was prompt, timely and professional. I especially appreciated her independence and initiative in helping me.” 

Elaine — Madison Ave
Elaine is the best floor person we've had in years. She is here every day and comes by at least twice a day to see if she can assist in any way. She is cheerful, courteous and very efficient. She gets the job done whatever it may be and way before the deadline. We so often are quick to write a criticism of people but I thought Elaine should be recognized for her accomplishments.” 

Kimberly, Darryl & Faiza — Madison Ave
"Kimberly, Darryl and Faiza were essential in helping with a large event. All three were the extra pair of hands that made the event a huge success."

Floor Host Team - PwC, 300 Madison
Last week Francis has an appreciation lunch for her Floor Host team at PwC, 300 Madison. It was a Hawaii theme were May birthdays, Mother’s Day and a graduation from Columbia University were celebrated. It was a great gathering to highlight the achievements and hard work of all the floor hosts.

At One Of The Big Four Mobile Communications Companies

Michelle & Rachel — Bellevue
"Kudos to Michelle And Rachel for their outstanding customer service provides to the end users at the client site every day. Their partnership with the client is appreciated and valued."

Mailroom Team – Bellevue
"Great job to Michelle and the team for all the support they provide to client, especially the Treasury side. They have been great in providing assistance with all the projects on site."

 From Our Clients In Property Management

Carlos  – Liberty Terrace
"Carlos continues to lead his team in the right direction. While the client has been out of the country Carlos has not only taken care of the FSO responsibilities but of other needs at the client site. He is a true team player and leader."

Belinda – Greene Street
"Belinda is the lead concierge at her site and she has no easy task. She works at one of the busiest properties and she carries out her responsibilities always with a smile on her face. She has been in the role for some time now but she continues to grow and learn."

To Our Professionals On Campus

Staff
“Thanks for all your kind help with mailing and shipping, whether it’s a big office project or a birthday gift that has to get to another state (or country), you always come through with a smile!” 


                                  To Our Team At The Tax Innovator Of The Year

Team
"Our day to day contact and the senior decision maker toured the client site last week and expressed how happy they are with the great work of the team. They were impressed with the space and the progress the team has made. The client appreciates the efforts of the team and look forward to more great work and service."

Thanks fort taking the time to write to me about these gifted employees. I am always eager to hear more about how we are doing.

Have a GREAT day as I look forward to seeing all of you soon.

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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"None of us is as smart as all of us." 
~~Ken Blanchard
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TED Tuesday: Build A Tower, Build A Team | Tom Wujec

"And sometimes, a little prototype of this experience is all that it takes to turn us from an "uh-oh" moment to a "ta-da" moment. And that can make a big difference."

Good Morning Folks,

Our site managers have incredibly varied job roles—their responsibilities include everything from overseeing change management to implementing internal communication strategies and new office technologies. For site managers looking to stay on top of workplace and technology trends, TED Talks can be a great resource. 

Tom Wujec's talk is a case in point. With almost 4 million views it outlines a staple team building exercise—he engages different groups in a simple tower building contest. The competition pits groups like kindergartners, engineers and CEOs against each other to see who can build the tallest tower within a time limit. The talk unveils some unexpected results, with teams who remove ego and focus on iterative methods winning over teams consisting of people typically in leadership positions. Managers who work with project-focused teams may find this talk especially helpful as it holds valuable information about matching incentives, skill sets and work processes in order to achieve a goal.

Tom Wujec presents some surprisingly deep research into the "marshmallow problem" — a simple team-building exercise that involves dry spaghetti, one yard of tape and a marshmallow. Who can build the tallest tower with these ingredients? And why does a surprising group always beat the average? Have a look:

With topics ranging from employee habits and leadership tactics, to big data and technological innovations, here are some other important TED Talks we've showcased for site managers to watch:

Jason Fried: "Why work doesn't happen at work"

David Autor: "Will automation take away all our jobs?"

Thanks to David Spence at Office Space for leading me to today's talk. And thanks to you for watching.

Have a GREAT day,

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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"Procrastination is the grave in which opportunity is buried”
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Ideas are not set in stone. When exposed to thoughtful people, they morph and adapt into their most potent form. TED Tuesdays on MitchWeiner.com highlights some of today's most intriguing ideas. Look for more talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more— HERE. 

Shout-Out Wednesday: Thanks For Always Wearing A Smile On Your Face… For Always Assisting

"You are a true asset, and we admire the work that you have done, are doing, and will continue to do for us.” 

Good Morning Folks,

Here are this week's Shout-Outs. We appreciate all your hard work and commitment and are very proud of you.


                                    From Our AMLAW 200 Clients

Marcus — Dallas
"Marcus goes above and beyond to help out every chance he gets, and the staff is very appreciative."

Khary & Sandy — Dallas
"Khary & Sandy have done a great job with document destruction per policy. They have also been great mentors to the intern that has been assisting at the firm."

Buddy & Jeremy — Boston
"We are very thrilled with all of your the hard work and efforts."

Greg — New York
"Greg went above and beyond during an event to show initiative. HE noticed a person wondering the office and escorted the person back to the boardroom. Greg then sat outside the boardroom to keep an eye on that person. Once the person left Greg also notified security in case the person tried to come back into the building."

Monica & Rachel — Houston
"Rachel and Monica both answer any and all requests for files in a timely manner and never miss a beat in the Houston records department. They are welcoming and willing to assist in anything that may come up throughout the day.  They are both versatile in each of their positions and can fill in to help in Office Services or cover reception when needed."



                                          From Our Retail Clients

Sultan  & Angela — New York City
"Sultan and Angela have been working together seamlessly for the past two months. They flawlessly completed 4 large repro jobs including 1 over the weekend to be ready for early morning meetings on Monday."

From Our Wall Street / Financial Services Clients

Andrew & Julio — New York
"Andrew and Julio always have the best "can do" attitude in everything they do. They are helpful in all things especially in the setup and break down of rooms for big events and meetings."

Sharifa — New York
"Sharifa is a tremendous assistant who makes everything run smoothly."

Lakisha — New York
"Lakisha did a tremendous job assisting in the preparation for a seminar on site. She arrived very early and stayed late for a Friday to ensure that the seminar went smoothly."

Alexander — New York
"Kudos to Alex for transporting documents to from a very important meeting. The success of the meeting was due in large part to Alex’s help and care with the sensitive information."

At The Headquarters Of The World's Largest Advertising Agencies

Frederick — New York
"Frederick is always willing to go the extra mile to make sure that tasks are completed on time. He also volunteers for a delivery that needs to made every day. He truly exemplifies FSO's “all Hands In” motto."

Roxanne — New York
"Roxanne supports conference center operations. She has displayed top notch customer service skills. Always helpful, she is incredibly polite, professional and courteous."

Tory — New York
"Tory has recently made additional efforts to ensure that packages are tracked and delivered successfully. The extra assistance is very much appreciated."

From The World's Largest Professional Services Firms 

Faiza — Madison Avenue
Faiza an be counted on every day to always make herself visible and proactive by going around the floor and asking for any assistance that she could provide morning and afternoon. She lets the team know where she will be so that she is reachable for any requests. Her assistance is valued by all she helps."

Elaine — Madison Avenue
Helpful and pleasant, Elaine communicates with the team to make sure things are going well. We are impressed with the level of hospitality and care she has shown."

Icelsa, Elaine, Kimberly & Melissa — Madison Avenue
"Icelsa, Elaine, Kimberly and Melissa provided much needed event support. They assisted with the room set up and laying out all the material for the event. Their help ensured the event ran smoothly."

At One Of The Big Four Mobile Communications Companies

Juan — Bothell
“Thank you for always wearing a smile on your face, for always assisting Polly and I when we needed, and being there to ensure that the buildings are kept tidy with supplies and name plates. Even though there is A LOT going on here you never seem to get overwhelmed and always get the JOB DONE. You come by our desks every day to see if we need you to do anything for us and we truly appreciate it. Thank you for all your help with the mail delivery, name plates, room checks, and daily emails. You are a true asset, and we admire the work that you have done, are doing, and will continue to do for us.”

 From Our Clients In Property Management

Christian
"Kudos to Christian for going the extra mile and walking up 14 flights of stairs with a guest who was afraid to take the elevator. That is superb customer service and reflects our values."

Gloria, Daniel & Jorge — Working On A College Campus
"Your entire staff is terrific! They’re always so friendly, helpful, and professional. I could always count on them to take care of all my requests."

A big congratulations to LaDon (pictured ), Donald, and Linda on graduating from our Future Leadership Program! We are so proud of the three of you and you have a bright future. Keep up the great work, energy and positive attitude. 

To all of those applauded, CHEERS to you and THANK YOU for working tirelessly to deliver Service Extraordinaire with a smile. I am so proud of all of you, and to count you among the FSO family. Keep up the great work!!

Have a great day and thanks for being a part of our amazing journey.

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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"The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own."  ~~ Benjamin Disraeli
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TED Tuesday: Why So Serious?

As the old saying goes, "you can either soar like an eagle or flock like a duck." In this disarmingly simple presentation, we learn to differentiate clearly between the avians of the business world.

Good Morning,

Today something different. Something funny. A satire of TED talks from The Onion.

A friend recently posted 21 short videos worth more than an MBA, the 13 most inspirational videos of all time, and the 7 most motivational feature films of all time.  Presenting Onion Talks: the most important ideas from greatest thinkers on the planet. No mind will be left unchanged

However, to quote another great motivational speaker in a famous movie: "Why so serious?"

Enough of the serious. The videos in this post are not worth an MBA and are neither inspirational nor motivational. But they're funny as all get out, IMHO.

More than that, they illustrate some fairly important truths about human behavior and the realities of the business world.

Enjoy any or all of my favorite three.

1. Ducks and chickens.
Amazing talk on cultural barriers. This minimalistic approach was very insightful and had an important message on how we should all get past our differences and communicate as the one true race that we are - the human race. Great job.

As the old saying goes, "you can either soar like an eagle or flock like a duck." In this disarmingly simple presentation, we learn to differentiate clearly between the avians of the business world. The duck says quack, while some animals on the farm take quite a different approach. Award-winning animal behaviorist Peter Garcia discusses these contrasting philosophies, and how we can reconcile them for a brighter future. 

VIEW HERE


2. The power of social media.
The world's most successful companies know that social media is a powerful marketing tool, and Cameron Hughes knows how to make social marketing even more effective: by never injecting an ounce of effort into it. No technology has ever had a bigger effect on our business culture than social media. In this groundbreaking presentation, we learn of the true power of social media to increase a company's value proposition.

VIEW HERE

3. The value of patience.
In our fast paced world, we expect everything at once. But Peter Redd says there is merit to waiting for desirable outcomes-- like savoring a delicious homemade pie. A perfect metaphor for a perfect talk.

In a world where everything moves so quickly, it's essential to cultivate the value of patience. Science shows that attentions spans are growing shorter each year and the ability to delay gratification is a strong indicator of life success.

VIEW HERE

Were it not for the conspicuous green logo propped up behind him, one might be excused for failing to realize that this is not, as it seems, a ted Talk, but rather, one of the first in a series that premières today called, “Onion Talks.” A year ago, YouTube announced a list of winning proposals for “YouTube Original Channels,” to expand the platform’s content; among them were ones submitted both by the Onion and ted. Sam West, the head writer of the Onion Talks series, imagined it would be just like ted, “only instead of a good idea, it will be a ludicrous one.” At first, he said, “We actually reached out to ted to see if they were interested in collaborating with us. But when they saw what we were up to, they didn’t really think it was an idea worth spreading.”

“Ideas worth spreading” is the tagline of ted Talks; for Onion Talks, it’s “No mind will be left unchanged.” During a popular ted Talk from last March, the author Susan Cain discussed the merits of being quiet, saying, “Eleanor Roosevelt, Rosa Parks, Gandhi—all these people described themselves as quiet and soft-spoken and even shy;” in an Onion Talk, a lecturer offers, “Did you know that this generation will be ten times louder than their grandparents? If George Washington were alive today, we would not be able to see or hear him.” From Cain’s ted Talk: “At the risk of sounding grandiose, it is the world’s loss, because when it comes to creativity and to leadership we need introverts doing what they do best.” As West and I discussed the irksome self-importance of these lectures, he stopped himself, and said, “I’m sounding all grandiose here.”

Ted has inspired an idea worth spreading, after all, which is that comedy emerges from people taking themselves too seriously. Nathan Heller, in his profile of the program for the magazine this summer, characterized the ted Talk personality like this:

People frequently say that ted has a low irony quotient. Actually there is plenty of irony at TED; what’s missing is a particular kind of irony, the underdog kind… . It is the mood of professionals who wear Converse to work, own multimillion-dollar homes at thirty-two, eat local, donate profits to charity, learn Mandarin, and rock-climb in the Pinnacles on Sundays. It is the friendly, self-effacing irony of winners. There is a joke around the ted offices which distills this West Coast irony for me. It goes, “Oh, so you’ve lost your legs and climbed Everest? So did everyone else.” Continued on The New Yorker...

And you can view the whole series HERE.

Have a GREAT day,

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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“Nothing will work unless you do."
 ~~ Maya Angelou

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Ideas are not set in stone. When exposed to thoughtful people, they morph and adapt into their most potent form. TED Tuesdays on MitchWeiner.com highlights some of today's most intriguing ideas. Look for more talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more— HERE. 

TED Tuesday: How To Be A More Creative Person by Bill Stainton

"Brilliantly written and delivered. Funny, insightful, eye-opening, and profound. Such a deep and meaningful message wrapped up in humor and fantastic story telling."

Good Morning Folks,

Since the centerpiece of FSO's value proposition is (re)IMAGINE!, I'd thought you'd benefit from watching Multiple Emmy® award winning executive producer Bill Stainton reveal the truth about creativity.

Creativity is born when two or more ideas collide! Bill Stainton delivers an empowering TEDx Talk about  looking beyond our own limitations and collaborating with people that are different than us. What an amazing message for all of us to embrace!

What do Johnny Depp, Bill Nye the Science Guy, and a little old lady from Russia have to do with being more creative?  More important, how can they help you tap into your own creative genius?

Bill Stainton believes that when we isolate ourselves from ideas, experiences, and people that are “different,” we are robbing ourselves, our businesses, our communities, and our world of the creative ideas that are essential to solving our biggest challenges. Only by becoming less isolationist—by “cracking our cocoon” and embracing people and experiences that may at first seem “weird”—will we discover the connections that can lead to breakthrough ideas.

Have a look:

Bill Stainton, you had me at HELLO with that awesome opening line, and I was riveted throughout. Brilliant, such a simple and powerful idea to connect different ideas and with different people. My fondest wish is that this talk is shared generously so others around the world can be inspired to connect the dots and make new connections that inspire creativity and make a fabulous impact.

Thank you for delivering it with such flair and passion. 

Have a GREAT day,

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

Ideas are not set in stone. When exposed to thoughtful people, they morph and adapt into their most potent form.TED Tuesdays on MitchWeiner.com highlights some of today's most intriguing ideas. Look for more talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more— HERE. 

Shout-Out Wednesday: "Everyone Raves About His Positive Energy And The Quality Of His Service."

"He does a great job in all that is asked of him. He is always willing to help."

Good Morning Folks,

Here are this week's Shout-Outs. This is exactly the kind of partnership our clients look for with our employees. Great job all!

Christopher — Luxury Retail
“I wanted to let you know Chris went above and beyond today helping find a package that UPS didn’t deliver due to an address issue and wouldn’t have made it here unless someone intercepted. He went down to the street and found the driver and rescued the package!” 

From Our Wall Street / Financial Services Clients

Sasha Russell — Banking
"Sasha has been a breath of fresh air. She has gone out of her way to be helpful.  We had to send out replacement tokens via UPS to over 200 eBanking customers in less than two months. Some of the deliveries were troublesome and she took the patience and time to talk to UPS for me and even request an investigation for problem deliveries. She even suggested a way to send out the tokens in the future to ensure that they would not be damaged during shipping.”

Shaklee — Insurance & Investment
"Shanelle has a positive attitude and a great smile. She is helpful in all that is asked of her and makes things much easier."

At One Of The Largest And Most Influential Architecture, Interior Design, Engineering, And Urban Planning Firms In The World.

Mercedes & Team — New York 
"Kudos to Mercedes and the team for always providing excellent service and continuing to WOW them each and every day. Your hard work and efforts are very much appreciated."

Christopher — D.C. Area

“I just wanted to let you know that Chris has done a great job the past two days while Jamie has been out. We had a crazy day with a lot of catering orders today. I was really impressed with how he took the time to prioritize the day and his attention to detail. He may be the best kitchen floater I've worked with."

At The Headquarters Of One Of The World's Largest Advertising Agencies

(15,000 people in 289 agencies across 81 countries)

Raven  — New York
"Raven has done an outstanding job on numerous tasks. Raven has taken ownership  working on different projects with short notice and staying late to ensure that the tasks were completed. Because of this, the agency has been able to focus on the new company implementation."

Lissette — SVP, Client Relations
"Congratulations to Lissette for providing great services and encouraging her team to excel each and every day. The firm is extremely happy with all her efforts and the work of her team."

Ryan  — Dallas
"Ryan done a great job at growing and managing the team under his leadership. All his extra efforts go a long way in providing excellent service."

DeCorrey — Dallas
DeCorrey is one of our seasoned employees. He is very well versed in his position and responsibilities and impresses time again. He always completes tasks with having to be asked and does so with an amazing attitude and a smile on his face. He is first to assist others in need and has done a great job mentoring some of our newer staff. We know we can count on him to help train new employees the right way and pass on his understating of what it takes to be successful. His determination and kind demeanor is contagious throughout the whole firm."

From The World's Largest Professional Services Firms 

Ezra — New York
"We receive weekly praises on Ezra. He is always extremely courteous, friendly and approachable. He strives to provide the highest level of services every day. Every raves about his positive energy and the quality of his service."

Maria — Los Angeles
"Maria goes above and beyond every day in all that is asked. We are beyond thrilled that Maria is part of the team."

Cristalle — Turnaround & Restructuring
"Cristalle jumped into a high pressure, high standards operation and has done a great job increasing the standards and level of service in a very short period of time.Her reliability, creativity, and excellent service has gotten the attention of not only the end users, but the Senior Partners. As a result of these stellar results she earned a promotion to Lead Associate in only a few short months."

Faiza — New York
"Faiza has been a great addition to the team. She is timely, accessible, friendly and gracious. She is always willing to help and takes her time with the task at hand  to ensure they are completed to perfection."

Nikeisha — New York
"Kudos to Nikeisha for stopping at nothing to find an open space for a team meeting. Once she found a space she was able to secure the room and make all the needed arrangements for the team’s meeting."

From The NYC HQ Of The World's Preeminent Daily Newspaper

Lesleyann — New York
"Thank you for Lesleyann for all her hard work in covering for a co-worker that was out on leave. Lesleyann not only fulfilled her daily tasks but also mastered new skills to be able to cover for her teammate."

Mildred — New York
"Mildred was out on leave and was missed dearly by her team. We are all very happy to have her back."

At One Of The Big Four Mobile Communications Companies

Miguel — Frisco

"Miguel foes above and beyond every day to assist, getting every tasks completed efficiently and with a smile on his face. Everyone comments on how great of a job Miguel does and what an amazing team player he is."

Markiel — Bellevue

"Markiel exemplified his keen sense of awareness last week. He noticed two people that had gained access to the client site but were not being escorted. He immediately jumped in and assist by escorting them back to reception and making sure that the appropriate people were contacted. He provided customer service to the visitors and also made sure to take actions in line with policy and procedure at the client site.

Dexter — Bellevue

Kudos to Dexter for being a good sport and joining the fun. He showed off the onesie and even added some bunny ears. Great job Dexter!!!!

 From Our Clients In Property Management

Sonya Perez – Liberty Terrace

Kudos to Sonya for working as a great secondary lead and assisting with training of new hires. She is also on time for her scheduled shift which helps make sure everything rubs smooth and continued great services.

A couple of weeks ago HQ celebrated National Grilled Cheese. We gave our HQ staff the opportunity to make their own grilled cheese sandwiches. The event was exceptional cheesy and enjoyed by all. Thank you to Office Services for as always putting this all together.

Finally, congratulations to Jonathan (pictured below) and Zachary on being our first Future Leadership Program graduates of 2017. We appreciate all their hard work and commitment and we are very proud of them.

To all of those applauded, CHEERS to you and THANK YOU for working tirelessly to deliver Service Extraordinaire with a smile. I am so proud of all of you, and to count you among the FSO family. Keep up the great work!!

Have a great day and thanks for being a part of our amazing journey.

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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Gratitude — "What a precious gift it is, feeling grateful. Small acts of kindness, thoughtfulness, words or deeds... they contribute to health and happiness."  
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TED Tuesday: Why Rejection Hurts So Much And What To Do About It

"We need to remind ourselves that we’re appreciated and loved so we can feel more connected and grounded."

Good Morning Folks,

We'll go to the doctor when we feel flu-ish or a nagging pain. So why don’t we see a health professional when we feel emotional pain: guilt, loss, loneliness? Too many of us deal with common psychological-health issues on our own, says Guy Winch. But we don’t have to. He makes a compelling case to practice emotional hygiene — taking care of our emotions, our minds, with the same diligence we take care of our bodies.

Psychologist Guy Winch shares some practical tips for soothing the sting of rejection in his TED Talk: "Why we all need to practice emotional first aid."

Rejections are the most common emotional wound we sustain in daily life. Our risk of rejection used to be limited by the size of our immediate social circle or dating pools. Today, thanks to electronic communications, social media platforms and dating apps, each of us is connected to thousands of people, any of whom might ignore our posts, chats, texts, or dating profiles, and leave us feeling rejected as a result.

In addition to these kinds of minor rejections, we are still vulnerable to serious and more devastating rejections as well. When our spouse leaves us, when we get fired from our jobs, snubbed by our friends, or ostracized by our families and communities for our lifestyle choices, the pain we feel can be absolutely paralyzing.

Whether the rejection we experience is large or small, one thing remains constant — it always hurts, and it usually hurts more than we expect it to.

The question is, why? Why are we so bothered by a good friend failing to “like” the family holiday picture we posted on Facebook? Why does it ruin our mood? Why would something so seemingly insignificant make us feel angry at our friend, moody, and bad about ourselves?

Another common mistake we make is to assume a rejection is personal when it’s not. Most rejections, whether romantic, professional, and even social, are due to “fit” and circumstance. Going through an exhaustive search of your own deficiencies in an effort to understand why it didn’t “work out” is not only unnecessarily but misleading.

Unfortunately, the greatest damage rejection causes is usually self-inflicted. Indeed, our natural response to being dumped by a dating partner or getting picked last for a team is not just to lick our wounds but to become intensely self-critical. We call ourselves names, lament our shortcomings, and feel disgusted with ourselves. In other words, just when our self-esteem is hurting most, we go and damage it even further. Doing so is emotionally unhealthy and psychologically self-destructive yet every single one of us has done it at one time or another.

The good news is there are better and healthier ways to respond to rejection, things we can do to curb the unhealthy responses, soothe our emotional pain and rebuild our self-esteem.  Check the talk out:


Rejection is never easy but knowing how to limit the psychological damage it inflicts, and how to rebuild your self-esteem when it happens, will help you recover sooner and move on with confidence when it is time for your next date or social event.

Have a GREAT day,

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

Ideas are not set in stone. When exposed to thoughtful people, they morph and adapt into their most potent form.TED Tuesdays on MitchWeiner.com highlights some of today's most intriguing ideas. Look for more talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more— HERE.