Ted Tuesday: Julian Treasure— ‘How to Speak So That People Want to Listen’

"Every human being needs to listen consciously in order to live fully."

Good Morning Folks

At FSO, listening to our clients needs is paramount to (re)IMAGINING their future. Ironically we win because our competitors fail in listening.

With that in mind and 3,591,725 combined Ted and YouTube views that have come before your own…. Julian Treasure's talk, "5 ways to listen better" is sure to enlighten you.

There are seven deadly sins of speaking, according to sound consultant Julian:

• Gossiping
• Judging
• Negativity
• Complaining
• Excuses
• Exaggeration
• Dogmatism

It can be difficult to stay away from these conversation killers, but Treasure says there are plenty of ways to make sure you don’t lose your listener. In this TED Talk, he shares tips to speak powerfully—and with a purpose.

The first step is to hail, an exercise in using honesty, authenticity, integrity and love to give your words meaning. Treasure says these things allow you to be clear in what you’re saying—to be straightforward in a way that establishes trust.

After you’ve nailed down what to say, you have to think about how to say it. That’s where the human voice comes into play. Treasure says using different vocal inflections and rates of speech can add an extra layer of meaning to your words—and really drive a point home.

“You have an amazing toolbox. This instrument is incredible, and yet this is a toolbox that very few people have ever opened,” Treasure says.

Is your voice giving you the presence you need? Here are some of the best tools in the box:

1. Register
“If you want weight, you need to go down here to the chest…. We vote for politicians with lower voices, it's true, because we associate depth with power and with authority. That's register.”

2. Timbre
“It's the way your voice feels. Again, the research shows that we prefer voices which are rich, smooth, warm, like hot chocolate.”

3. Prosody
“People who speak all on one note are really quite hard to listen to if they don't have any prosody at all. That's where the word monotonic comes from, or monotonous, monotone.”

4. Pace and Pitch
“I can get very excited by saying something really quickly, or I can slow right down to emphasize…. Of course, pitch often goes along with pace to indicate arousal."

5. Volume
“I can get really excited by using volume…. Or, I can have you really pay attention by getting very quiet. Some people broadcast the whole time. Try not to do that.”

By teaching the next generation to listen and to be empathetic, they will have a better chance at creating an understanding world, and ultimately a more peaceful world.

“Conscious listening creates a world of connection, of understanding and of peace.”

Watch Julian’s talk here:

Thanks to Success magazine for their insights that contributed to this post, to TED and most of all to you for listening. 

Let's all go make things happen today. I look forward to seeing you soon.


Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

Ideas are not set in stone. When exposed to thoughtful people, they morph and adapt into their most potent form.TED Tuesdays on MitchWeiner.com highlights some of today's most intriguing ideas. Look for more talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more— HERE. 

TED Tuesday: Celeste Headlee— 10 Ways To Have A Better Conversation

"I keep my mouth shut as often as I possibly can, I keep my mind open, and I'm always prepared to be amazed, and I'm never disappointed."

Good Afternoon Folks,

Today's TED selection is an ideal compliment to our leadership development work with Dr. Payne.

When your job hinges on how well you talk to people, you learn a lot about how to have conversations — and that most of us don't converse very well. Celeste Headlee was the Midwest Correspondent for NPR before becoming the co-host of the PRI show "The Takeaway.” After that, she guest hosted a number of NPR shows including "Tell Me More,” "Talk of the Nation,” "Weekend All Things Considered” and "Weekend Edition". Celeste also anchored election coverage for PBS World in 2012 and was a regular guest on CNN.

She knows the ingredients of a great conversation: Honesty, brevity, clarity and a healthy amount of listening. In this insightful talk, she shares 10 useful rules for having better conversations. "Go out, talk to people, listen to people," she says. "And, most importantly, be prepared to be amazed.

I think the tips she gave in her speech were very helpful. Many people do not listen anymore. Like she says, everyone wants to talk and get out what they would like to say. I think people would have better conversations if they would just listen and understand what everyone else is saying. People need to stop talking, and take in what is being told to them.

Here's what two of the million plus folks who have viewed the talk and to say:

"I thought this talk was very interesting and insightful, especially coming from someone who basically has conversations for a living. I like the comment about the importance of entering a conversation with the idea that you will learn something new, and I think it is fascinating to think that everyone we meet knows something we do not (like one of the quotes said). I was able to relate to the point she made about not always trying to relate by bringing in personal experience, because no two experiences are identical. I often get annoyed when people do that, whether it be something positive about their life when I share good news or something negative when I talk about my problems, but I know I do the same thing, so that is something I should be mindful of in my future conversations. I like to watch TED talks a lot, but this one is not one that I would normally have clicked on while watching on my own, and I am glad I was "forced" to watch it!" 

"When you are young, you are taught that you must be active listeners and to always pay attention when someone is speaking to you. However, you are never really taught what that really means. These are the ways to make business relationships and carry yourself with confidence, and I believe the points you made are very valid. Thanks for the advice on how to become a better conversationalist in an era driven by technology! :)"

Have a look:


I thoroughly enjoyed this video and all the ideas that were presented within it. I hope that you did too.

Have a GREAT day, be happy and…

Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

*TED is a nonprofit devoted to Ideas Worth Spreading. It started out (in 1984) as a conference bringing together people from three worlds: Technology, Entertainment, Design. Since then its scope has become ever broader. Along with two annual conferences -- the TED Conference on the West Coast each spring, and the TEDGlobal conference in Edinburgh UK each summer -- TED includes the award-winning TED Talks video site, the Open Translation Project and TED Conversations, the inspiring TED Fellows and TEDx programs, and the annual TED Prize.  More at TED.com

Throwback Thursday: Selling Like A Mad Man: Being Don Draper

"You can't sell something you don't believe in yourself, and you can't sell it to someone who doesn't buy into your process. You have to want it to get it, and you have to have absolute confidence in what you're pitching."

Good Morning Folks,

Mad Men's Don Draper is a "get its, get it". Thanks to Oren Klaff's brilliant book, Pitch Anything, I am now a bigger fan. If you have not yet read Pitch Anything, I highly recommend you do so.

What follows, inspired by Pitch Anything, is an excellent illustration of not only how to play to win, but how to avoid the “Slow No”.  Sales people tend to forget that one of the most important attributes to their trade is not to sell, but to first qualify and disqualify prospects. Not everyone is meant to be a fit. Listening, understanding, and then eventually selling are the keys to a mutually rewarding customer partnership. 

As a fan of Mad Men, I realize Don Draper’s style is harsh, but if you are not bold and willing to have a deliberate “adult conversation” with your prospects and customers, then you are wasting precious time that should be directed toward believers.

==> The traits that make Don Draper successful include:

• An insatiable desire to win.

• Solid business acumen.

• Ability to take action.

• A rare ability to see what others will never see. 

I have met many "Don Drapers" in my career. Companies with ten to twenty salespeople are lucky if they have one on their sales team.

I thought I'd ask other top sales executives I know what they think are the top qualities one should look for when interviewing candidates for a sales position. Here they told me in no particular order.

• Aptitude: The one not often mentioned  is aptitude. After all we all want someone who can understand the product mix. Their aptitude needs also to extend to comprehending the various types of businesses/situations your customers are in, or how else will they be able to properly uncover needs.

• Listening: God created us with 2 ears and one mouth, to listen with as much as we talk. Qualifying and disqualifying the client are important. As a sales rep, the top priority is get more possible background situation of customer at very beginning, so he who is not good at listening and only preaches the specs, the company and/or  the price to a potential customer mostly will end their chances right there. Because, we are not led in our selling by selling "products and services" but more around the experience of what we offer, understanding the client and what story they are telling to their clients. Then how we can help them with that specifically. 

• Determination: You can't sell something you don't believe in yourself, and you can't sell it to someone who doesn't buy into your process. You have to want it to get it, and you have to have absolute confidence in what you're pitching. Your attitude has to be "We know what we offer is top shelf, and if you can't see that, then it's you that's missing out" rather than getting desperate for a sale---clients can smell that from a mile away. The successful sales person takes the word no as the beginning of the sales cycle and is even more determined each time they hit an obstacle 

• Resilient: A successful professional sales person can only have success if they are resilient. There are far more No's than Yes's out there. Every time you don't get the sale, you have to keep the positive attitude to move on.

• Cultural Fit: As a first step, I'm always looking for fit rather than skill set. Can they thrive in an environment like ours… high activity and direct feedback? You can train an employee to have the desired/necessary skill set - you can not train an employee to fit into the culture of your organization.

• Entrepreneurial Spirit: I look for someone who will take ownership. I look for a "fit as well" in my last hire I did this and it has been a great success. Passion. 

• Adaptability: In today's competitive environment of rapid innovation, flexibility is essential. Aptitude and attitude are also key trait

• Likeable: What comes to mind is someone who is "likable". Likeable is someone who relates, listens, identifies needs and can speak in the language of the client. Someone who is funny and has a great spirit

Don Draper had those qualities suggested as well. He looked the part and you could trust that.

There was always something in his eyes-- when he got inspired you could feel that and you knew you were on good hands no matter what he was selling.

Some of those traits are hard to discover in interviews. You must get the interviewee to tell stories. You can't determine that just by asking them to sell you a pen. Because, in sales, if you have all of the other qualities but can't listen, can't understand the customers pains before running your mouth, you will always put your foot in it.

Here are a few clips of Don Draper in action. Have a look at magical works of wisdom from the godfather of closing:

==> Don Draper Sales Pitch

==> Don Draper wants: All of it

==> Position Yourself. Nothing Is Free.

==> Mad Men - Jantzen Meeting

I love these clips. They really do work in a Sun Tzu "Art of War" kind of shorthand for summing up the essence of Don Draper.

Don is confident in his ability, vision, and capacity. Professionally, Don is strictly take-no-prisoners. He can clearly see where his clients need to go and how he will get them there. Don is a storyteller. 

Thanks to Chris Young Founder and Thought Leader, The Rainmaker Group, Inc for inspiring this post with his. Says Chris: "The Rainmaker Group uses an advanced "Moneyball Approach" to help Clients select "wolf class" salespeople that scare the hell out of the competition." Now that's exactly what Don Draper would say if he was pitching Chris' business. lol

I want take this opportunity to thank you for what you do every day to make FSO GREAT!

If know of someone who would enjoy working for or with FSO please do not keep us a secret.


Have a Personal, Passionate & Productive Day!

Mitchell D. Weiner
Chief Happiness Officer

Learn more about what DIFFERENTIATES FSO here

LinkUP Thursday: Love. Life. Happiness.

Good Morning Folks,

This week I've found some great articles to share about spirit, passion, attitude, 'pep in the step'; as you know, all my favorite topics.

We start with a video by the Chief of all Chief Happiness Officers, Sir Richard Branson on how he picks people for his team and what you should do to find the right people for yours. It's very much like our process at FSO. Below Richard's brief video, are links to this week's articles.

I hope you get as much from them as I did.

Have a GREAT day as I look forward to seeing all of you soon.

Mitchell D. Weiner
Chief Happiness Officer

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"There are only two ways to live life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. 
The other is as though everything is." ~~Albert Einstein

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