FSO Chicago Goes To The Ballgame

It is said, "The way your employees feel is the way your customers will feel. And if your employees don't feel valued, neither will your customers." We believe in putting employees front and center with power and imagination — to fire enthusiasm, build company loyalty, encourage creative thinking and teamwork and create long-lasting memories.

As an example, our Vice President of Sales, Ron Kelly, hosted a team outing on the rooftops in Wrigleyville with a few of our Chicago top performers. It was a great opportunity for folks who are in the business of delivering hospitality to witness VIP hospitality from a customer's shoes. They picked up many tips and ideas to take back to the sites. What's more, the Cubs won!

This is how we take care of the people who take care of you.

CHEERS to our Chicago team, and THANK YOU for all for your dedication and commitment to our clients. 

Spring Into A New Career; We're Hiring at FSO

 "Exceptional service is not found solely in the monumental—the oversized errands or the last-minute changes. It is achieved through every moment of kindness, care, and sincerity that we share with our clients."

Good Morning Folks,

Welcome to spring and a great time to clean out the old and blossom the new,

What another AWESOME week ahead at FSO! Here are some of the things we have in store:

• Kim, Chelsea, and I will host a Fireside chat with a select group tonight
• We have our monthly "Leadership Strategies" management meeting Tuesday
• Our SLT Breakfast/Lunch/snacks continues

I am especially excited about our Fireside Chats which affords a rare opportunity for a diverse group of employees to meet directly with ownership and top executives to discuss what's on THEIR minds, as well as brainstorm how we can become more profitable and productive. How we can improve teamwork and add an even more personal touch to how we do business. Watching as we bounce ideas left & right in these chats ignites a fire in not only me but in other employees as well.

Then tomorrow our management team comes together their monthly Leadership Strategies meeting, part of a major initiative to develop and nurture all levels of company management into stronger leaders. The Leadership Strategies program is a groundbreaking concept in the outsourcing industry. We simply aim to make managers stronger leaders, for if they are not how can we continue to exceed our customer’s expectations?

As you often hear, there is nothing more important than having GREAT people in our company and we are ALWAYS looking to add talent to our team. In addition to the positions that we are always sourcing for, we have the following approved needs:

New York
·          Facilities
·          Security Officer

San Jose, CA
·          Lab Associate

Philadelphia, PA
·          Office Service Associate 

Chicago, IL
·          Floater
·          Hospitality Representative
  
Concord, CA
·          Office Service Associate
  
New Jersey
·          Mailroom Associate

I promise everyone a career at our company, not just a job. That's why I am excited that our next Future Leaders Program congratulatory letters are going out this week. Congratulations to everyone who has been accepted into our Future Leader's Program program, and great job in continuing to OWN your career

It takes courage and commitment to learning new things to inspire others, which prevents stagnant job performance and careers. I am excited to see our programs will unlock the full potential we know our managers already have.

At FSO, industry leading training, incentives, rewards, recognition and a TRUE career path sit at the heart of a successful company culture. To learn how an FSO partnership can unlock your own firm’s growth potential, contact Mitch Weiner at (212) 204-1193 or CLICK HERE to email Mitch, directly.

Keep SPOTTING TALENT and keep sending us your referrals to psteam@fso-outsourcing.com.

Have a GREAT Monday and a wonderful week!

Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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“Everything you've ever wanted is on the other side of fear"
~~ George Addair
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FSO: Built For The Future

"The power of FSO has ALWAYS been our people and your belief in my vision. FSO, as a company will never be a follower. Look how we can innovate when we all share our collective intelligence, passion and belief in the outcome!"

Good Morning Folks,

I am so happy it is Daylight Savings Time!! Warm weather and melting snow.... Yay!!

We are continuing to build our infrastructure to ensure that we are Built for the Future. Sharon and the entire finance team have worked tirelessly behind the scenes to get our profits and cash processes and procedures in place, sales has a new playbook. Tom and the IT Team have implemented Salesforce, created BlueSky to give our clients more flexibility and mobility into the insights of running their businesses, and are working on many other exciting technology solutions.

People Solutions led by Kim  and with great assistance from Missy, Chelsea, Shalaine, Ethan, Don, Lori, Eddie, Brittany, Travis, Sabrina, Shantelle, Dominique, are turning out great programs from Future Leaders to CHO Breakfast to "the Box"

As a growing company, it is important for us at HQ to hear all your questions, comments and concerns so that we can better support the field. With that being said, the People Solutions team are asking you to keep your suggestions coming! We don’t know what we need to fix or improve unless we open our ears and eyes to you – the field! So we created "The Box". There are two options allow you to either send in a suggestion with your name attached to it OR anonymously!**

We are constantly asking our employees (YOU) for your opinions and thoughts because we CARE and we want you to know you have a voice. We value and appreciate each and every one of our employee’s suggestions & you can help us to create the happiest place to work. We want you to talk to us and share with us - your thoughts, your successes, your worries, your dreams, etc. What training do need and want to make you more successful and make our clients feel that WOW! factor? 

We all too often get hung up on what is NOT working rather than what is; or those damn potholes that seem to never get fixed because we don't see the bigger picture. I have been humbled, proud and excited to see what the power of all of us brainstorming together has recently created.  

The FSO culture is our differentiator, and one that I am so proud of! As I travel the field it is so great to see and experience all of our awesome employees who truly demonstrate the FSO spirit of hard work, dedication, and loyalty with the skip, fire, twinkle, and smile that is expected. Great job and Thank You!

The power of FSO has ALWAYS been our people and your belief in my vision. FSO, as a company will never be a follower. Look how we can innovate when we all share our collective intelligence, passion and belief in the outcome! 

In case you missed it here are links to two important communications we released last week.

We have great stories in the February Newsletter featuring our profiles of our rising starts and account wins at Voya, Nixon Peabody (the 69th largest law firm in the United States) and the competitive displacement at Medimmune."  READ all about it HERE! 

Since the early 1990s, ceo profiles by Jeff Zbar in Advertising Age, Entrepreneur, Inc., Business Journal, and the South Florida Sun-Sentinel are legendary, Jeff recently sat down with me for an extensive interview to discuss FSO's rapid growth and how we are driving towards a prosperous future with a personal, passionate and productive culture and a focus on creating jobs and career opportunities for the "hourly demographic" that others have left behind. READ all about it HERE!

As we enter this new and critical business week, lets remember to stay focused, united as a team and 100% positive that we will achieve success. If you believe it, you will achieve it! 

Have a GREAT DAY! 

Mitchell D. Weiner
Chief Happiness Officer

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 "None of us is as good as All of Us!"

~~ Ray Kroc 

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Mitch Weiner Interviewed By Insider Report: "Outsourced Services With Relentless Customer and Employee Engagement – and the Pursuit of Happiness"

This “forgotten demographic” is not forgotten or overlooked by me. In fact, I was who they are.”

Good Morning Folks,

Since the early 1990s, bylines, blogs, executive biographies and recurring columns by Jeff Zbar have been published published in scores of regional and national publications and websites, including Advertising Age, Entrepreneur, Inc., and Herman Miller’s JuggleZine, Florida Trend, Writer’s Digest, the South Florida Business Journal, the South Florida Sun-Sentinel.

Jeff recently sat down with me for an extensive interview to discuss FSO's rapid growth and how we are driving towards a prosperous future with a personal, passionate and productive culture and a focus on creating jobs and career opportunities for the "hourly demographic" that others have left behind.

In the interview, I give Jeff my philosophy on the things that have made me successful having started and built three outsourcing companies, managing tens of thousands of employees in thousands of America's most recognized brands.

In the piece Jeff writes, "Once a David to corporate Goliath’s,Weiner’s promise to deliver personal, passionate and productive service has earned FSO the 24th spot on Crain’s Fast 50 list of the 50 fastest-growing privately held companies in the New York area and earned inclusion in the Inc. 500|5000 ranking of the fastest growing companies in the United States for three consecutive years.

Concludes Zbar, "Weiner’s made a career pulling these individuals, whom he calls his “Rising Stars,” from obscurity into the glow of personal success. Weiner will always be that guy in the space who cares enough to take care of the hourly employee from the middle manager down. Big companies are too big to care – to teach these employees, to embrace them, to help them create lasting careers.”

You can download and read the full interview HERE.

I very much appreciate this recognition and Jeff's taking the time to speak with customers and employees. He has accurately captured my business plan: Always improve the customer’s business – no matter what; always take care of our people, through better incentives, training and career pathing; and always deliver added value to the customer.

As the article makes clear, we've built and grown his business with an emphasis on people – the hardworking, dedicated employees who care about doing a great job for our clients. 

Know that I am personally invested and CARE about every person in our company. It is part of the personal touch that sets us a part in this industry and in business compared to most.

Believe in yourself, work hand and know that anything is possible and I will work as hard as you to ensure that all of your dreams come true.

You are all winners in my book. Shine on.

Have a GREAT Day and please send in the sun shine!

Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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“I always strive to do better today than I did yesterday.”
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Inspire ME Friday: Our First Print Edition of the Mitch Weiner Newsletter Is Hot Off The Press

"We have great stories in the February Newsletter featuring our account wins at Voya, Nixon Peabody (the 69th largest law firm in the United States) and the competitive displacement at Medimmune."

Good Morning,

As you read this, employees at FSO sites all over the country are picking up a major Friday dose of inspiration— the hot, fresh off the press inaugural edition of the Mitch Weiner Newsletter.

The Mitch Weiner newsletter showcases all facets of FSO success. FSO is committed exceeding our client’s expectations every day in every way. From, yours truly,  our Founder & Chief Happiness Officer, through our 2,000 onsite employees, our focus is on delivering an unmatched outsourcing experience.

We’ve built this incredible business to afford opportunities for each and every one of you to shine and grow personally and professionally. 

When I look at FSO today, I see hundreds of lives transformed... people with careers, not jobs. People thriving, not just surviving. 

We provide so much to our field employees. We guide, mentor, teach, support them. We show them they are important, show them they matter, show them we care. And it is our obligation and pleasure to assist you to reach your goals. 

Here you’ll read about folks just like you, that arrived with no special skills other than a desire to learn, work hard and grow. And their careers have accelerated beyond their wildest expectation .

We have great stories in the February Newsletter featuring our account wins at Voya, Nixon Peabody (the 69th largest law firm in the United States) and the competitive displacement at Medimmune.

You'll read about the Future Leaders Program, CHO Breakfast and Messenger and Clerical Internship programs. Three of our employees rapid rise through the ranks to fulfilling their wildest dreams are profiled. And FSO's most decorated concierge shares his white glove secrets.

You also meet the winners at our recent National Awards presentation and be able to browse job opportunities for you or someone you may know.

Read the newsletter here and note this and future editions will be accessible through the top right navigation right here on MitchWeiner.com

We want to hear your thoughts. What did you like? What can be improved? And what kind of news and inspiration did we omit that could make future editions more valuable to you,

It's been a rough cold winter but as you can see from the newsletter, in our heart's it's spring every day at FSO.

Have a GREAT weekend. Everybody!

Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

Inspire ME Friday: Hospitality— The PERSONAL + PASSIONATE + PRODUCTIVE Way

"Being the Hospitality Manager allows me to get to use all three parts of the slogan on a daily basis. I get to be PERSONAL with both the client and site managers to really feel the pulse of FSO at the site and to hear what FSO can be doing at their sites to be more PRODUCTIVE and go above and beyond to impress the client on a daily basis."

Good Morning Folks,

My pick of the internal communiques for your weekly does of Friday inspiration comes from newly hired, yet deeply experienced, Hospitality Manager, Ethan. Here's Ethan:

Happy Friday! 

Ethan at your service

I have the pleasure of writing to you today about what my experience since I have joined FSO Nation a few months ago. 

When I first started at FSO I was excited for a new environment and a change of pace from the monogamy of working in hotels. As it is when you start a new job, you were sold on the company and the people that you met with but you can never be 100% sure of what you are actually walking into. After speaking with Mitch and the rest of the ELT and hearing their vision and expectations I knew right away that FSO would be a company that I would want to be a part of. They certainly haven’t disappointed yet! 

FSO, I quickly learned is a company across the nation full of vibrant, fast paced, passionate and friendly people who all went out of their individual ways to make me feel included in this giant family. Family, at the core, is what FSO really is and stands for. 

My best and consequentially my worst quality is that I care too much about family and friends. When my family and friends are happy I am able to rejoice with them and bask in the happiness but when they’re disappointed or unhappy I feel that disappointment or unhappiness as it is mine. I make it a personal mission to make sure that whatever is troubling that person I do whatever I can no matter what it takes, to go above and beyond to make sure that person when walking away from me is leaving with a smile on their face. 

Although FSO has only been in existence for 4 years, a lot of the people in this company have worked with each other at various locations or different companies over the years. 

Obviously the main connection between us all is our connection to Mitch. An undeniable fact is that Mitch cares for all of us and cares for the well being of FSO. Mitch literally eats, breaths and barely sleeps thinking about FSO and how we as a family can make FSO bigger than it already is. It is Mitch’s vision as the head of this family to keep us growing but it requires all of us, his family to see his vision as well and take it to all of the sites and have our clients feel it too.

One of FSO’s biggest phrases is PERSONAL + PASSIONATE + PRODUCTIVE. This simple slogan to me is at the heart of all the messages Mitch sends out to the company and one that I abide by the most when I am in the field. As the Hospitality Manager for FSO I have the privilege to go all over New York City and meet with both the teams and clients at the various accounts that we are situated at. 

Being the Hospitality Manager allows me to get to use all three parts of the slogan on a daily basis. I get to be PERSONAL with both the client and site managers to really feel the pulse of FSO at the site and to hear what FSO can be doing at their sites to be more PRODUCTIVE and go above and beyond to impress the client on a daily basis. After being with the company for close to four months now I have become PASSIONATE about what we are trying to accomplish as an organization and even more PASSIONATE about what the PS Team is doing and it allows me to get out and spread the news on what is going on within FSO. 

It is up to everyone in this family to help FSO become the biggest and best Outsourcing company  in the world!!! The only people that can hold us back is ourselves and if everyone comes to work and uses the PERSONAL + PASSIONATE + PRODUCTIVE mantra and the power of positive energy and focus then the sky is the limit for what we can achieve. Mitch has laid the yellow brick road, it is our job to follow it to success!!!

LET’S GO FSO USA!!!

Ethan, thanks for the wonderful message this morning and super glad you are with the FSO family.. love having you and your smile. Happy Friday to all of you.. and YES, it is a chilly weekend forecast ahead in New York but it warms my heart to be working with Ethan and all our FSO team who are cut from the same cloth.

Have a Happy, Healthy, Safe and Refreshing Weekend,

Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

Inspire ME Friday: Don Adams- "I Am A Champion"

Don Adams w/ Other FSO Champions

"I will acknowledge the fact that I am an elite warrior who arrives at the cutting edge of battle by any means at my disposal. I accept the fact that my team expects me to move further, faster and fight harder than our competitors . Never shall I fail my comrades. "

Good Morning Folks,

Get ready to be fired up today from Experience Director Don Adams, my selection for the best of the best internal posts to share. Don....

Good Morning and welcome to a brand new day at the happiest place on the plant. I thought I'd start the day with a simple question....are you a champion?

I will conquer what has never been conquered. Defeat will not be in my creed. I will believe where all those before me have doubted. I will always endeavor to uphold the prestige, honor and respect of my team. I have trained my mind and now my body will follow! 

==> WHO AM I? …. I AM A CHAMPION!!!
I will acknowledge the fact that I am an elite warrior who arrives at the cutting edge of battle by any means at my disposal. I accept the fact that my team expects me to move further, faster and fight harder than our competitors . Never shall I fail my comrades. I will always keep myself mentally alert, physically strong and morally straight and I will shoulder more than my share of the task whatever it may be. One hundred percent and more. 

==> WHO AM I? …. I AM A CHAMPION!!!
Gallantly will I show the world that I am a specially selected and well trained warrior. My heart and my soul will be the fuel to carry my body when my limbs are to weary. I will never falter, I will never lose focus as long as there is hope in my mind and my heart still beats. I will never give in to the evil that is weakness and I will fight that evil with my dying breath. 

==> WHO AM I? …. I AM A CHAMPION!!!
Energetically will I meet our competitors, no one will challenge me, none will stop me from my goal. I shall defeat them on the field of battle for I am better trained and will fight with all my might. Surrender is not a Champion's word. I will never leave a fallen comrade to fall into the hands of our competitors and under no circumstances will I ever surrender. 

==> WHO AM I? …. I AM A CHAMPION!!!
Readily will I display the discipline and strength required to fight on to my objective and I will complete my mission. I will rise when I fallen.  My competitors need not fear me but he will respect me and if he does not. I will make him respect me with all that I have to give. 

==> WHO AM I? …. I AM A CHAMPION!!!
History will remember my name and he will not have to be kind. For I will have denied his criticisms and put in my own praise, No one will define me, no one will tell me what I can achieve, none will say I have not given all I have to give and none will take my glory.

WHO AM I? ….  I AM FSO/USA and FSO/USA is ME!!! .....Don

Neal Michael shared another fantastic email yesterday talking about our competitive differences and the lack of care for our new client from the haphazard way they maintained the space and cleanliness, to how they failed to provide any process improvement, innovation and can’t even think about what (re)IMAGINE looks or feels like. None of our competitors can and they just don’t get it.

More than the passion to care about ourselves and our client's welfare so deeply, it's all the happy, inspired people like Don Adams and Neal Michael who do a great job supporting us every day that have made FSO the unstoppable force in outsourcing. Thanks for all you do.

Be Inspired Today as I am and Make a Difference!!!!!!!  

To fully enjoy your weekend let go of the working week. There are times to work, rest and play. Weekends are for all of the above but in a relaxing way.

Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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"Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten" 
~ David Ogden

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Read more inspiring messages from our employees HERE

InspireME Friday: Nothing Makes You Happy; You Have to Decide to be Happy.

"The thrill of creative effort gives a slightly different type of happiness. It is a feeling of action, rather than completion. Putting effort into making something potentially beautiful from random thoughts, ideas, and raw inspiration is really quite a rush. 

Good Morning Folks and Happy Friday!!  

Since its Friday and we all enjoy, and are moved by quotes, I decided to start this morning message with a quote about how we should be at work and in life…HAPPY.

“Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort.” Franklin Roosevelt

Which leads me to this week's pick of the best of our employee communications. Today our always best-dressed Regional Director, Shawn Curwen
, returns to knock it out of the park a second time with a post titled "Nothing Makes You Happy; You Have to Decide to be Happy":

"This quote means a lot to me and says that the joy of achievement is one pathway to happiness. How do you feel when you achieve something? I tend to make me feel happy, especially when it was an achievement that means something to me.  Working for FSO means you always have the potential to be happy and share it with others.  Achievement is all around us waiting to be experienced.   

At the top, signifying this potential is our very own CHO- Chief Happiness Officer, Mitch Weiner!  The “smile” is always there because he sees achievement all around him. Not just in the success of a business that has “only just begun” but in the people that support this business. The Power of Focus…the vision, the strategy and the execution were all involved and are the building blocks to this success and Happiness! 

Ironically, this quote also mentions the thrill of creative effort as another path to happiness. Do you enjoy the creative process, and the effort involved? At the best Onsite Outsourcing Company in the nation, you have every opportunity to show your creativity!  

It’s one of the biggest differentiators in working for FSO and biggest reasons we have been successful. Because of YOU, we can share in the happiness.  Coming up with crazy ideas to please a client or giving kudos to an employee who has done an exceptional job should inspire us to inspire others to be creative.  I believe this is part of the reason I love where I am and what I do. The other half is that I truly believe that i 

I’m not having fun what am I doing any of this for. The thrill of creative effort gives a slightly different type of happiness. It is a feeling of action, rather than completion. Putting effort into making something potentially beautiful from random thoughts, ideas, and raw inspiration is really quite a rush. At FSO you can quench your creativity by writing a blog, a newsletter, a morning message, creating something graphically, creating or improving an innovative way to process something electronically. These are just some small examples how we create “the happiest place to work” at FSO USA. 

Remember, nothing makes you happy; you have to decide to be happy. There is a satisfaction in accomplishing or creating something. It’s what we continue to do at FSO every day. Always have fun as you do the things that bring joy and thrills to your work and life.

All the best to you, today and always!

As Stacey wrote to me recently, "When I think of hospitality, I think of hotels and when I think of the most hospitable hotel in the world, the Ritz Carlton comes immediately to mind. I like to think of FSO as the Ritz Carlton of the outsourcing business. 

We continually strive to go "above and beyond" with our clients to provide the most enjoyable experience. 

Many of the Ritz's beliefs mirror the beliefs of Mitch and FSO. "Provide genuine care and comfort for your guests; provide the finest personal service and facilities and fulfill even the unexpressed wishes and needs of our guests" (clients)."

My dream of building the best outsourcing company in the world is unfolding right before our eyes. Let's jump on board and be a part of the journey at the happiest place to work in the nation.

Cheers and have a HAPPY, SAFE and JOYOUS weekend.

Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

Read more inspiring messages from our employees HERE

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"The higher you climb the better the view"

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The Art of Business / Dinner Conversation

"With so much focus on what to say, it can be easy to forget that talking is only half of a conversation. The other half, of course, is listening. “One thing most people enjoy is when other people pay attention to them,” says Smith. This includes listening closely to what others have to say, asking questions to get them to say more, and genuinely appreciating what was shared."

Good Morning Folks,

I have been out in the field a lot and plan on increasing that. At the sites. Meeting the folks. Talking to the folks. Dining with our clients and more to better understand the market, what they are hearing and how we can help.

The field is where it happens. It is where we learn. Get information.  And build from. Headquarters needs "field-real" information so we can ensure that FSO is solidly positioned for the future and nothing stands in the way of us dominating the market place. 

As many of you know Pat, Jim and I can be out entertaining clients till 11PM every night with great food, fine wine and stimulating conversation. Something I doubt you'll find the top executives and owners of our competitors doing.

And for many clients at the highest level, this is where we offer unsolicited growth advice that has become one of FSO's greatest value adds. We are able to observe innovations in place A and connect the dots with place B. But the best brainstorming and the real ideas flow the mood is just right and the environment perfect and removed from the day to day grind of the office.

So clients often ask, how do you orchestrate these dinners night after night and you enjoy them so much? is there an art to a business conversation? Mitch, what are your secrets?

And I always refer them to a primer on the subject I received from one of my regular stops across the country: Capital Grill.

==> I present ... The Art of Conversation  byMeta Wagner for The Capital Grille

An hour cocktail party or two-hour business dinner can feel like a day dragging on if you aren’t silver-tongued or you wind up paired with someone who is less-than-outgoing. Even captivating public speakers or extroverted account executives can sometimes find themselves at a loss when the go-to topics (business, movies, weather, kids) are exhausted.

Fortunately, no matter where you are on the conversation comfort scale, there are techniques that can make any conversation engaging, meaningful, and memorable.

==> Banter like the Best Conversationalists
Conversation, as with any art from, has past masters that the rest of us can emulate. And, no group of gabbers is as renowned as the Algonquin Round Table. These writers, critics, actors and wits, including Dorothy Parker, met for lunch regularly at the Algonquin Hotel from 1919 to 1929, producing linguistic gems that are still quoted to this day.

Not everyone can produce the perfect bon mot, but everyone has personal stories to share. And, storytelling, according to Paul Smith, author of Lead with a Story, is the basis for relationship building through conversation. This is especially true in the workplace, where, all too often, hallway chatter can seem predictable or even superficial.

Smith says that there are two types of stories you can tell that will be instant hits. “Be self-deprecating,” says Smith. “Everyone would love to hear about how you accidentally hit ‘Reply All’ to the company email and admitted something a little embarrassing to the entire organization.”

The other welcomed type of story is about when you learned something, or learned it in an unexpected way. “Talking about your medieval history class might only be interesting to other history buffs,” says Smith. “But if you tell a story about how you learned medieval history by watching Monty Python movies and cross-referencing the facts in Wikipedia, almost anyone will find that entertaining.”

==> Create a Genuine Connection
Storytelling can also take you beyond simple camaraderie and actually allow you to create a closer, more genuine bond with co-workers or clients. It all depends on how willing you are to be open and honest.

“The most effective stories are ones that create vulnerability by showing an insecurity, or describing a painful time in your life, or a costly failure,” says Smith. “They’re exactly the kind of stories people don’t want to tell to a bunch of strangers in the office—and that’s the point. It’s a vicious circle. We don’t tell our personal stories because we work with strangers. They remain strangers because we don’t tell our personal stories. You have to break the cycle. Tell your own stories and challenge other people to tell theirs, and you’ll never work with strangers again.”

Daniel Menaker, former editor at the New Yorker and Random House and the author of A Good Talk, agrees. “Take risks and confide in others,” he advises. “Those are the conversations that come from nowhere and develop into exchanges with more meaning.”

==> Treat Conversing Like a Task
Stimulating repartee, funny anecdotes, and personal disclosures are the stock in trade of a great conversationalist. But there are also times when you might feel shy or anxious about attending an upcoming dinner party or company outing. That’s where your project management skills will come in handy.

Debra Fine, author of The Fine Art of Small Talk, says to approach these occasions as you would any other project. “Most of us are great at tasks,” she says. “That’s one reason why we’ve succeeded, professionally.”

First step is a little reconnaissance. Fine suggests getting hold of the guest list if you can and reviewing everyone’s names, especially partners and spouses, so you can try to recall what you know about each person and, if you’ve met before, what you talked about the last time you were together.

Next, prepare three “conversation starters” that are broad enough to appeal to nearly anyone and are designed to elicit specific, and hopefully interesting, responses. “Bring me up to date with that project you were telling me about last time” or “What’s been going on with work for you since the last time I saw you? “ Or, Fine’s favorite when you’re speaking to someone you don’t know well, “What keeps you busy outside of work?”

Finally, come to any social event equipped with short answers to questions you’ll probably be asked, like “How’s your year been?” or “How are the kids?”

==> Listen Intently
With so much focus on what to say, it can be easy to forget that talking is only half of a conversation. The other half, of course, is listening. “One thing most people enjoy is when other people pay attention to them,” says Smith. This includes listening closely to what others have to say, asking questions to get them to say more, and genuinely appreciating what was shared.

Alex Lickerman, M.D., physician and author of The Undefeated Mind, also believes that the value of being a good listener cannot be overstated. He says that shifting the attention away from yourself and toward others--genuinely caring about what they have to say--“will lead to an approach and tone that people will notice and warm to. And it will make you less fearful in engaging with others.”

The benefits of being a good listener do not end there. As Smith observes, one requirement for any great conversation is to have at least one good listener. “And if that’s you,” he says, “you will be the one in the group people like because you were largely responsible for ensuring that those speaking were having a good time.”

The best news about becoming a better listener? As Smith points out, “You don’t have to be a great talker to be a great conversationalist.”

As to who pays the bill, whomever invited the other person out customrily picks up the tab and offers transportation home (especially for our employees and ladies after 9PM, we prefer them not in the subways). Uber is a click away and reasonable rates.

Enjoy your dinners!

Cheers and a toast to you!

Love Life!

Mitchell D. Weiner

Chief Happiness Officer  

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"His lips drink water but his heart drinks wine” ― E.E. Cummings

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** Meta Wagner is the “Vox Pop” columnist for PopMatters, an online magazine of cultural criticism. Her articles and essays have appeared in Salon, The Boston Globe Magazine, Chicago Tribune and The Christian Science Monitor.